tardisity: The oldest person alive was born on April 19, 1897, meaning that April 18th, 1897 was approximately the last time the Earth was inhabited by an entirely different set of people and if you don’t think that’s the realist shit ever then you can get right on outta town.
chinkerbelle: Reasons I grab my boobs running upstairs running downstairs running stoked on life scared walking through my house in the dark bored boobs
noonereadstheurl: I honestly can’t blame David Karp for wanting to sell this website You can only be called “daddy” by white middle-class teenaged girls so many times before something just snaps
genocidercyo: clockey: you’re the window to my wall you’re the sweat that drips down my balls
trapghoul: pussy 101 it cleans itself it has a smell (get over that, boo boo) it makes the rules
abortionista: if u think my constant vocal feminism is annoying imagine how annoying the patriarchy is to me
handsomedorothy: funimationentertainment: no but really name one student or teacher who was so distracted by skin that they couldnt teach or learn properly like rly if you’re a teacher and you’re so distracted by the flesh of your underage students you can’t teach need a different job AND POSSIBLY A PRISON SENTENCE
ejacutastic: do not tell me to calm down
forever-classyx: Oh my gosh people, be nice to your waiter/waitress, it’s not their fault that your food is cold or if it’s under cooked. Be nice to the cashiers who are still training and can’t ring up your items as quickly as you want. If a stranger smiles and says hello to you, smile and say hello back! It’s just common courtesy, I don’t understand why people have to be so rude.
g4l4xxy: I often can’t remember if something actually happened, or if I only dreamt it.
january 2013: this shall be my year may 2013: well, shit
Relax. You will become an adult. You will figure out your career. You will find...– Johanna de Silentio (via quotecatalog)
ejacutastic: if i’m dating you and you don’t compliment me and spend more time with me than absolutely anyone else than we ain’t gonna work
you can pretend like i dont exist but i still made you whimper like a little bitch when you were about to cum
tempestpaige: if you chew loudly around me there is 80% chance i will go into a psychotic rage and shove whatever you’re chewing up your asshole.
fitandwild: I always think you should be with someone you’re not only happy to be with, but proud to be with. Someone you really just want to make happy more than anything. Someone who can be your absolute best friend. I think that’s my problem, I’ve never had that before.